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The Man tries hard to support my love of blogging. Some days he’s successful. Others he is not.

It’s the nature of the beast, you see. If he does not believe in something, even if this belief is born out of ignorance, he will automatically dismiss it as something not important.

One might say this is a very self absorbed approach to life.

I’m inclined to agree with One.

The Man is one of these folk who do not consider things that happen online as “real life”. Now I can understand that people have come to form this view based on virtual reality stereotypes (e.g. gamers) but it is such a gross generalisation and it makes me feel quite stabby.

Blogging is my hobby, my time out for me. A creative outlet that would otherwise be repressed. The Man’s hobby? Watching copious amounts of football (he also has an unhealthy obsession with courtroom “reality” shows but we’ll leave that for another post).

About football he says: ”At least it’s real.

Real? Sure it may be real people who actually play, but it is only a game, after all. You may make some level of emotional investment in this game but what do you get in return?

Does the commentator say “You really have a good point there, Man!” when you yell abuse at the ref?

Do the players really care if you , The Man, watch or not?

Apart from losing a bet or hurting team pride, what are the stakes for you as an individual if the game is lost?

You are not playing. You are a spectator to someone else’s reality.

But blogging, for me, is a little different.

Sure we are both facing a screen, but when I blog I am not playing or watching a game.

When I blog I am a real person, writing about real events in my life. These events are framed by real feelings, to which real people who read  can often relate, respond and we really CONNECT. Maybe even form a friendship.

How can you get more real than that?

Even when I read someone else’s blog, Facebook post or tweet, I can choose to be an active participant in their reality. They let me into their lives, they make me nod and smile, laugh and sometimes even cry. And I don’t have to be a silent spectator or just a cheering face in the crowd. I can reach out and really CONNECT with that person. Regardless of geography, race or team colours.

Sure, some bloggers may show the world a slightly glossier version of their reality, but me? Real as it comes.

So my dear husband, yes blogging is real and like it or not you’re married to a REAL blogger.

Does your partner understand your blog or hobby?

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30 Responses to Is blogging real?

  1. I would go as far as to say that Hubby gets blogging. He’s met bloggers, he’s collected parcels and packages. And most of all, he gets that there’s something big going on out there online and his wifey has a front row seat to it.

    I vote leave your hubby to his thing and you do yours. He’ll come around sooner or later. Or he won’t and you can go on enjoying it anyway. ;)
    Melissa {Suger} recently posted..Mi Goals Winner!My Profile

  2. MsMandie says:

    I empathise with you on this one! Mr. Mandie supports me in all that I do, of course, but this does not stop him from making it fairly clear he sees my blogging as a nice time waster! He often asks what I’m doing, leans over to see I’m typing away, and he says, “Oh, you’re working on your little blog”. Little blog!
    MsMandie recently posted..My Kind Of SignMy Profile

  3. Robyn @slightly deep says:

    I get this. My hubs gets blogging a bit… But he doesn’t necessarily see it as important. And sure it doesn’t put food on the table, but it does record our lives. Plus it gives me head space and is very good for my mental health which is important! I think this can be a common issue for mummy bloggers- ‘me time’ an issue for mums in general!

    • Née Say says:

      I think the mental health aspect is one of the most important things for me & one that he really doesn’t understand. If only we could all be bloggers with a six figure income ;)

  4. kirri says:

    I love the football analogy (even though I loathe football!). My hubby is supportive of my blog, but while we may be able to appreciate each others enthusiastic investment in different areas, he doesn’t truly ‘get it’…although he makes much more of an effort than I do to get football :)
    kirri recently posted..A short guide to achieving life balanceMy Profile

    • Née Say says:

      hehe that’s great that you have a supportive partner Kirri. For all the years I’ve put in trying to “get” sports, I’d like a little return for my investment ;P

  5. Mel says:

    I completely agree with you! My husband has no interest in blogging, and even goes so far as to say that FB businesess are not ‘real businesses’. If they have a website, yes he thinks they are but otherwise no. But, he is more than happy to partake in his current obsession of playing ‘Battlefield 3′on the PS3. I am constantly on the lookout for ways to make good money from my obsession of card making/scrapbooking. His response..’you can’t make money from it, it’s not a big enough industry especially in the country, if we lived in Melb or Sydney, then yes you might be able to’. It’s very tough being married to a complete logical thinker, who really only sees things as black or white (he’s also studying to be an accountant which doesn’t help). Anyway, I will keep blogging, keep reading other peoples blogs, keep supporting FB businesses, and keep trying to find a way I can make good money from my obsession :)
    Mel recently posted..Happiness DefinedMy Profile

    • Née Say says:

      Ohh how frustrating! I totally get the black & white thing. No shades of grey to my husband either. Wishing you lots of success in your business – feel free to post a link to your biz on my FB page :)

  6. Great post and totally agree, yep, it’s real. My husband has his moments of not understanding, but he is so addicted to Words with Friends and watching the football/cricket/tennis, that he really isn’t in a place to complain!

    For me, there are so many wonderful writers whose blogs I follow, whose posts often sit with me all day. They inspire me, they support me and they give me a different perspective to what I would have had otherwise.

    And I have been lucky enough to have a few of my bloggy/twitter friendships cross over into real life. Which has been so special!
    Renee | About a Bugg recently posted..You can’t argue with that.My Profile

    • Née Say says:

      Maybe we can get our men together in one room & they can watch sport while simultaneously playing each other on Words with Friends? (although The Man’s now into Hanging with Friends). I know exactly what you mean about those posts that sit with you all day. I often ask myself if I would really miss anything if I didn’t read so many blogs and the answer is yes – I really think it makes my view of the world richer. x

  7. I have to say my hubby is pretty supportive of my blogging. He’s extremely supportive of me writing but he struggles understanding the ‘social’ aspect of it (FB, twitter etc). I spend a lot of time reading my posts to him and keeping him involved as much as I can including getting his opinion on blogging topics. It definitely sparks more interest from him if he knows he’s getting a mention here and there (there’s a method in my madness ;) ).

    If you want him to understand you can always make him feel like he’s playing a part in your blogging…..Or you could just be happy he doesn’t bother you when he’s watching footy :P

    • Née Say says:

      That’s a really good point Jac, he does seem a lot more understanding when I’m discussing things like giveaways or ideas for posts. In any case I’m certainly guaranteed lots of quality writing time this football season as foxtel are airing 5 games a weekend!! Thanks for your advice x

  8. Great post and can totally relate. DH doesn’t ‘get’ blogging full stop. He sees it as a waste of time that could be spent otherwise. For me it is firstly writing, which is my hobby, and secondly a connection. And yes it is real!

  9. Great post! I think sometimes men automatically dislike and diss what they dont understand. Give him time, he will come around.

    My husband was the one, back in 2009, who urged me to start my blog – I’d have never done it without him!
    Donna @ NappyDaze recently posted..The Birth of the Woolworths Baby and Toddler ClubMy Profile

  10. It’s hard to dedicate the time to writing posts and creating an online presence if you don’t have the support at home.

    Mr Di-licious is very supportive and recognises its not just wasting time – it allows me to practice my crafts: writing, baking and photography.

    He also encouraged me to go to DPCON12 to meet other bloggers and network with my new industry.

    Blogging is real.
    Di @ Life is Di-licious recently posted..My first CWA meeting (at 40)My Profile

  11. EmmaK says:

    Ha ha yeah I hear you! How is my husband shouting at the players on the footie game on TV ‘do this!’ ‘do that!’ ‘you idiot you missed that!’ REAL? He is just an armchair umpire with no impact on the game and I don’t really care if he does it and yet he calls my blogging ‘mental masturbation’ ha ha …well that is funny but I can’t say it turns me on. Blogging is not really real but it is a fun diversion from real life for me.

  12. I was only having the footy conversation last night with my husband when the Broncos lost in the last minute. He takes it SO personally – like he was playing and lost. But he wasn’t. He was just watching! Blogging is so much more than that. You’re not sitting in the grandstands or in your lounge room passively staring at a screen. You’re playing the game and connecting with people all over the world. That’s real.
    Nikki @ Styling You recently posted..Build your blog before you hope that they will comeMy Profile

    • Née Say says:

      Maybe it’s a boy thing? I so don’t get the yelling at the TV!! I certainly haven’t yelled at my computer yet… well maybe AT my computer but not at anyone THROUGH my computer ;)

  13. Blogging is very real for me. The people I connect with through my blog are way real-er than the people I know IRL. I feel as if I know them a lot better than I know those IRL and they certainly know me extremely well. When I sit here writing a comment, after just reading your words, I am talking to a real person, telling her how I feel and when she reads it she will “hear” me. I highly doubt that the refs and footballers the Man yells at on the screen hear anything but the roar of the crowd.
    Dorothy @ Singular Insanity recently posted..Are women really equal?My Profile

    • Née Say says:

      I’m glad (but not really surprised) so many people feel the same way, Dorothy. Definitely can relate to what you say about people you meet through your blog being real-er than those IRL. Thanks for your comment x

  14. Rachel says:

    I know my hubby gets annoyed by it all but I try really hard to do it when he isn’t around – this isn’t always possible as I never blog when the kids are awake. that doesn’t leave much time to keep up with it all so inevitably I will be doing something blog related in the evening…
    I find it is real – in some ways I think people are more real through their blogs than they are in real life!

    • Née Say says:

      That’s a very challenging situation Rachel. I wish I could say I didn’t blog when the kids are awake but if I didn’t I may never blog at all!!

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